“How are you feeling?” This question, often asked by counselors, is met with humor in media portrayals, yet it uncovers a profound truth: many of us struggle to understand our own emotions. Emotions can be elusive and seem unreliable, leading us to disregard them. In the hustle of life, we seldom pause to reflect on our emotional state.

But why is it crucial to be in tune with our emotions? Here are three compelling reasons:

Recognizing Emotions Shields Your Mental and Physical Health

Life’s adversities can inflict emotional pain and trauma. Identifying and processing your emotional responses to such events is vital for healing. Unprocessed emotional pain can evolve into stored trauma, stunting personal growth and diminishing joy. Neglecting emotions can obstruct recovery, potentially leading to further distress.

Moreover, acknowledging emotions is not only beneficial for mental well-being but also for physical health. Often, emotions are sidelined or suppressed, which can manifest physically as high blood pressure, gastrointestinal issues, and sleep disturbances. This occurs because emotions modulate stress responses, including the activation of fight-or-flight hormones. For a deeper understanding of stress’s physical repercussions, refer to my blog on Toxic Stress.

Emotions are Integral to Your Narrative

Your emotions, while not the entirety of your story, are a significant chapter. They emerge in response to life’s events and interactions, offering insights into what’s flourishing and what may require change. Overlooking emotions leaves gaps in your life’s narrative. Remember, your story—and therefore your emotions—hold immense value..

Emotions Drive Behavior

Ever found yourself baffled by your own actions? At times, we behave in ways that puzzle us, or we act contrary to our wishes. Our behaviors are intertwined with our emotions and thoughts. Recognizing the thoughts triggered by life’s occurrences, along with the consequent emotions, can illuminate the reasons behind your behaviors.

​​Tune Into Your Emotions: Three Exercises to Practice

Understanding and managing our emotions is a skill that can be honed with practice. Here are three exercises designed to enhance your emotional literacy:

1. Identify the Emotion in the Moment

When you find yourself puzzled by your behavior or overwhelmed by your thoughts, pause and ask, “What am I feeling right now?” Aim to name the emotion you’re experiencing, not the thought. For instance, instead of saying, “I feel like I don’t matter to my boss,” which is a thought, try to articulate the underlying emotion: “I feel disregarded,” or “I feel frustrated.”

If you’re struggling to pinpoint the emotion, refer to this list of primary emotions: happy, sad, angry, confused, jealous, excited. To deepen this exercise, document the situation and the associated emotion, and discuss it with your therapist in your next session.

2. Reflect on Your Day

Before sleep, dedicate a moment to review your day and discern the various emotions you encountered. Recording these in a journal can be helpful. Over time, you may begin to recognize patterns in your emotional responses, which can provide valuable insights into your emotional habits and triggers.

3. Observe Emotions in Others

Practicing emotion recognition in others can also improve your own emotional awareness. Children, with their expressive nature, are excellent for this exercise. Try to infer the emotions they might be feeling based on their expressions and actions. What cues lead you to identify one emotion over another?

Reach Out

Counseling offers a supportive environment to explore your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It’s entirely normal to face challenges in tuning into these aspects of yourself.

If you’re considering assistance in navigating your emotional landscape, reaching out for professional help is a positive step towards self-discovery and emotional well-being. I would be happy to help. Search for a therapist today!