Parents or caregivers are the first line of support and communication when something has happened to a child. As a result, parents want to be able to show their support and let their child know that they are there to listen. Knowing just how to do that can be challenging. Things like our tone of voice, our rate of speech, even the faces we make all contribute to what we are communicating.

Here are a few tips parents can use to help improve their communication skills, especially with their child:

Be You

Parents and caregivers are models for communication for their children. Children often look up to them as examples of how they should communicate with others and express themselves. When we are genuine, they typically feel comfortable enough to be genuine too. It is important to share our own feelings with children by talking about how things make us feel or our thoughts about the conversation can help to model expression.

Active Listening

Active listening means giving our full attention when another person is speaking to us. This can be helpful when speaking with anyone, especially with children. Active listening can include getting down on the child’s level, making eye contact, stopping whatever task we are doing, nodding or engaging in other behaviors that show we are listening, and being aware of what facial expressions we are making. Engaging in these small acts help a child know that we care about what they are saying and that we are capable of taking the time to listen to what they have to say.

Make Them Feel Safe and Heard

We want children to know that they can come to us with anything they need. So, it is important to assure them that they won’t be in trouble for telling us, and that even if they did something they weren’t supposed to, we appreciate that they came to us first. Sometimes children may feel afraid to approach their parents or caregivers when they need help, advice, or a shoulder to cry on. An important action to remember is to follow through with promises made or express that you want to continue the conversation again and let them know that you value what they said.

Praise and Appreciation

As sources of support, we want to give praise to children for expressing themselves and communicating with us. This can show them they are valued and reinforce this positive behavior. Telling children, “Thank you for sharing with me,” “I appreciate you telling me this,” or “it was very brave of you to talk about your feelings,” are some examples of things you can say during a conversation.

Overall, as parents and caregivers, we want to provide a safe space for our children to feel seen, heard, and appreciated to encourage communication with us. After trying some of these tips, we may still experience some difficulty with communication with children. There are different avenues of support for improving relationships and communication with our children, such as speaking with a licensed counselor with knowledge in this topic. Reach out to get started today!