With the beginning of the new year upon us, many feel the need to set lofty resolutions—promises that often fade as the weeks go by and life gets busy again. But, what if the approach to “new year, new me” shifted? Instead of resolutions that hinge on external achievements, let’s focus on priorities and intentions that anchor us to what truly matters.

The Cons of Resolutions

Resolutions often come with an all-or-nothing mindset– leading to black and white thinking when life is most often lived in the gray. Goals like, “I’ll go to the gym five times a week,” or, “I’ll quit sugar completely,” lead to restrictive schedules and lifestyles. While well-intentioned, these goals can create pressure and guilt when life gets in the way. The moment we make a mistake, no matter how small, it’s easy to abandon the resolution altogether, leaving us trapped in a cycle of guilt and self-doubt.

The rigidity of these resolutions leaves little room for the ebbs and flows of life. There are always unexpected responsibilities, shifts in priorities, or even moments of fatigue can change even the most thoroughly thought out plans. The problem often isn’t in motivation or ambition– it’s the framework those values are applied to.

Priorities vs. Intentions

Priorities are about identifying what holds the most meaning for you at the moment. They are guidelines for your decisions and help allocate your time and energy effectively. Intentions, on the other hand, focus on the how. They aren’t  about specific outcomes but about aligning your actions with your values and who you aspire to be. Together, priorities and intentions create a framework that’s flexible, compassionate, and deeply personal.

This approach emphasizes the journey over the destination. While resolutions often feel like rules, priorities and intentions give you room to grow and adapt. They encourage mindfulness and a deeper connection to your values, which can lead to a greater sense of fulfillment.

Choosing Priorities and Intentions

Choosing the focus of an entire year can be daunting but it starts with a simple formula:

Reflect -> Define -> Set -> Revisit (and Adjust)

1. Reflect on the Past Year: Start by reviewing the past year and taking stock of multiple themes: What are things that brought you joy? What felt overwhelming or draining? Are there moments, relationships or values that stand out to you from the previous year? Asking yourself these questions can help define what you would like to keep and what you wish to leave behind.Consider your successes and your struggles. Often, the areas where we face challenges offer the most insight into what truly matters. For example, if you struggled with work-life balance, prioritizing boundaries might be a key focus for the year.

2. Define What Matters Most: Ask yourself: What are my core values? What areas of my life need more attention—family, health, personal growth, career? Make a short list of priorities that resonate with you. Be honest and realistic for your current season of life.

3. Set Meaningful Intentions: Think about how you’re wanting to feel and who you’re wanting to be this year.

4. Revisit (& Adjust): Life is always changing, which can have an impact on your priorities and intentions. Taking the time to schedule a check in with yourself every month or quarter can be helpful in reassessing or tweaking goals as needed. Schedule time every month or quarter to reassess and tweak your focus as needed. This reflection time allows you to guarantee the goals you have are aligned with your values. Giving yourself the space to adjust your intentions with the context of your life is an act of self-understanding and compassion.

Tip: Keep It Simple! Choosing no more than 3 priorities or intentions helps with staying focused and makes the risk of overwhelm lower. This allows for more steady progress, even if the steps are smaller!

The Benefits of This Approach

• Sustainability: Intentions are adaptable, which allows you to adjust without feeling like you’ve failed. This flexibility fosters a sense of ongoing growth rather than a black and white mentality of pass/fail.
• Self-Compassion: This method encourages growth while keeping at its center that progress isn’t linear. It allows you to celebrate small wins and learn from setbacks without negative self-talk.
• Alignment with Values: By focusing on what matters, you’re more likely to feel fulfilled and motivated to stick to your intentions. This alignment creates a sense of purpose that can sustain you despite possible struggles.

Examples to Get You Started

• Priority: Deepen relationships with loved ones.
• Intention: Be fully present during family time, setting aside devices and distractions.
• Priority: Focus on health and well-being. Intention: Cultivate a daily mindfulness practice and prioritize rest.
• Priority: Advance in your career. Intention: Approach challenges with curiosity and confidence, seeking opportunities to learn and grow.
• Priority: Embrace creativity. Intention: Dedicate time each week to explore a creative outlet, whether it’s writing, painting, or cooking.

Reach Out

As steps are taken into this new year, give yourself the gift of grace. Priorities and intentions don’t demand perfection; they invite growth and purpose. They encourage us to be in the moment, and to align our actions with what matters most to us. Here’s to a year of meaningful growth, guided by your priorities and intentions defined by you.

Don’t hesitate to reach out and take a step forward in your journey! We would love to support you here at Optimum Joy!