Have you ever wondered what it would look like to embrace the rain? To allow its droplets of kindness to rest gently on your skin. To be still and allow its soft tender voice to wash over your anxiety, sorrow, and stress.

They say, “April showers bring May flowers.” Why wait until April to take a walk in the rain, when you can experience the RAIN of Self-Compassion right now. You will be surprised what flowers bloom after the RAIN of Self-Compassion has fallen on the overwhelmed, angry, and hurt version of you.

What is RAIN of Self-Compassion?

RAIN is a mindfulness practice used to bring awareness and compassion to difficult emotions. It is used to help people turn toward and process the emotions fear has led them to hide from. It supports people in getting to the other side, where light and flowers reside.

There are only 4 steps to walking in the RAIN of Self-Compassion. Come away with me as I take a walk in the RAIN.

R-Recognize What’s Going On?

What is the first thing you do when you look in the mirror? You take note of what is before you. Recognizing means taking note of and bringing awareness to the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are affecting you in the present moment. This stage requires you to listen to the sensations of your body, the rhythmic patterns of your thoughts, and the instrumental of your critical inner voice. It calls attention to the tightness of anxiety, the unbearable weight of depression, and the ghost of shame or fear.


The Beatles said it best: “Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be; Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.” Oh, if we would just let ourselves be. This stage is all about acceptance and allowing your emotions, thoughts, feelings, and sensations to be as they are. Some people find this stage to be the most difficult and that’s because it’s quite unpleasant to sit with the unpleasant. It is most people’s tendency to turn away from or distract themselves from what is uncomfortable. If we don’t turn away from it, we may find ourselves serving a heaping pile of judgement.

When you feel the urge to escape or pour out judgment, refrain yourself by offering these simple phrases of acceptance: “Right now, it’s like this,” and, “It’s okay to feel like this.”

I-Investigate with Kindness

James Stephens once said, “Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.” In the investigation stage, we are free to allow our natural curiosity to take over. Deep within us is a desire to know the truth about our feelings, emotions, and experiences. Are you willing to get vulnerable? If so, here are a few questions that will help you uncover unconscious beliefs and emotions.

  • What is seeking my attention?
  • What am I believing?
  • How does this feeling serve me?
  • What do I need to experience freedom from this pain?

N-Non-Identify and Nurture

I am set free when I recognize that my emotions and feelings are not me. It can be so easy to associate how you feel with your identity and your existence. When we begin to practice non-identification, we are able to discover and get a sense of our true self; one not fused with any limiting narratives, sensations or emotions. We can now shower and nurture ourselves with the loving presence of compassion, kindness, and self-care.

If you are reading this article and you are struggling with processing difficult emotions or practicing self-compassion, we would love to connect with you and support you on your journey of walking in the RAIN of Self-Compassion. Give us a call today to schedule an appointment.

Written by therapist Treshana Lewis