7 Signs of a Female Narcissist

📅 Updated: July 14, 2025
This article was originally published in June 2024 and has been updated to include new helpful resources.

While narcissistic traits are commonly associated with men, narcissism is prevalent across genders. In this article, we’ll explore seven key indicators that may suggest the presence of narcissism in women. Understanding these signs can be pivotal for individuals navigating personal and professional relationships, and can serve as a compass for fostering healthier connections.

We will also discuss the difference between overt and covert narcissism. This distinction is crucial in understanding the nuanced behaviors of narcissism in women. Moreover, we will touch upon the common patterns of female narcissism in a cheating scenario.

Finally, we will provide strategies for coping with female narcissism. This guidance can be a lifeline for those in a personal or professional relationship with an individual who displays signs of narcissism.

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Understanding Narcissism in Women

Narcissism in women is a topic that’s often overlooked, often due to societal stereotypes about femininity. However, narcissism is not gender-specific, as it manifests in both men and women in varying ways. In women, narcissism can often be covert, making it harder to identify. This is why understanding the signs of narcissism in woman is crucial. In the following sections, we will delve deeper into what defines narcissism and the spectrum of narcissistic behavior.

What is a Narcissist?

Narcissism is expressed when an individual exhibits an inflated sense of self-importance. They have a deep need for excessive attention and admiration. However, behind this mask of heightened confidence often lies a fragile self-esteem; it’s vulnerable to even a slight criticism. People who experience narcissism often have troubled relationships. They may come across as charming initially, but their lack of empathy and disregard for others’ feelings can lead to conflicts.

The Spectrum of Narcissistic Behavior

Narcissistic behavior exists on a spectrum. On one end, we have healthy self-esteem and confidence. On the other end, we have Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). This is a mental diagnosis characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance and a lack of empathy for others. Understanding this spectrum is key to identifying and interacting with people who have narcissistic traits.

The 7 Signs of Narcissism in Women

Identifying narcissism in women can be challenging. They often mask their narcissistic traits behind charm and charisma. However, there are certain signs that can help in recognizing narcissism.

1. Excessive Need for Admiration – Women who have narcissist traits crave admiration and validation. They often seek out situations where they can be the center of attention. They may use their charm and charisma to attract a following. However, this need for admiration often stems from a deep-seated insecurity, and their self-esteem is fragile and dependent on external validation. This makes them sensitive to criticism, often reacting with anger or defensiveness.

2. Manipulative and Controlling Behavior – Other characteristics include being manipulative and controlling. Various tactics are often used to maintain power and control in relationships. One such tactic is gaslighting, where others are manipulated into doubting their own perceptions and memories. This allows them to control the narrative and maintain their image.

3. Lack of Empathy – A defining trait of narcissism is a lack of empathy. These individuals struggle to understand the feelings of others. This lack of empathy often leads to exploitative behaviors. They may take advantage of others to meet their own needs, without considering the impact on the other person. Their inability to empathize also makes it difficult for them to form genuine, deep connections with others. This can lead to conflicts in relationships.

4. Envy and Competitiveness – Women who experience narcissism often exhibit a high degree of envy and competitiveness. They may feel threatened by others’ success or happiness. They may also try to undermine others’ achievements to maintain their sense of superiority. This competitiveness often extends to their personal relationships as well.

5. Sense of Entitlement – Narcissism in women can show up when they believe they deserve special treatment and have unrealistic expectations of others. They may expect others to cater to their needs without reciprocation. This sense of entitlement often leads to conflicts when their expectations are not met. Others’ kindness or generosity may be taken advantage of in order for them to meet their own needs.

6. Covert Narcissistic Traits – Covert narcissism is a less obvious form of narcissism. Narcissism in women is often exhibited through covert traits. Women with narcissism may present themselves as victims or martyrs to gain sympathy and manipulate others. They may also engage in passive-aggressive behaviors as a means of control. Covert narcissism is often resistant to introspection and self-awareness. This complicates efforts to address their narcissistic behaviors.

7. Female Narcissist Cheating Patterns – These patterns of cheating include engaging in infidelity as a means of gaining narcissistic supply. These individuals may use cheating as a way to maintain control and power in their relationships. Their cheating patterns often involve manipulation and deceit and may include gaslighting or other tactics to maintain their image and avoid accountability.

Recognizing the Impact on Relationships

The impact of female narcissism can be profound. The behaviors of these individuals can cause significant distress and harm to those around them. The lack of empathy, manipulative behaviors, and need for control can lead to toxic relationships that result in emotional, psychological, and sometimes even physical harm.

They may use tactics such as gaslighting, smear campaigns, and triangulation to maintain control. This can lead to a sense of confusion, self-doubt, and fear in their partners. Understanding these effects can help in setting boundaries and seeking help. It’s important to remember and to note that the narcissistic behaviors are not a reflection of the partner’s worth or value.

Strategies for Coping

The following strategies can be helpful for coping with and responding to narcissism in relationships:

Set Boundaries

Setting boundaries is crucial in all aspects of life, whether it be in personal relationships, at work, or in social situations. By setting boundaries, individuals are able to clearly define what is acceptable behavior and what is not. This not only helps protect oneself from being taken advantage of or mistreated, but it also creates a sense of respect for oneself and in the relationship. Setting boundaries involves establishing limits and communicating them clearly to others, allowing individuals to assert their own needs and priorities without feeling guilty or being disregarded.

Seek Professional Help

Seeking professional help when dealing with complex relationships can be extremely beneficial. Therapists and counselors are trained professionals who can offer valuable insight and guidance to help individuals navigate the complexities of these interpersonal dynamics. By working with a therapist, individuals can gain a better understanding of their emotions, behavior patterns, and communication styles, which can ultimately lead to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. Additionally, these professionals can provide a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to explore their thoughts and feelings, ultimately helping them to develop the skills and strategies needed to improve their relationships and overall well-being.

Practice Self-Care

Finally, self-care is absolutely essential for individuals who find themselves in toxic relationships. It cannot be overstated how crucial it is to prioritize one’s own well-being and mental health in such situations. Taking care of oneself is not selfish, but rather a necessary step in protecting oneself from the emotional and psychological harm that can result from being involved with someone who exhibits narcissism. By practicing self-care, individuals can establish boundaries, build resilience, and cultivate a strong sense of self-worth that can help them navigate the challenges of dealing with a narcissistic individual.

Our Therapist-Recommended Resources

Healing from narcissistic relationships is a journey that often requires multiple sources of support and guidance. While professional therapy remains invaluable, these carefully selected resources can complement your healing process and provide additional tools for understanding, coping, and rebuilding. Each resource has been chosen for its therapeutic value and practical application in real-world situations.

Should I Stay or Should I Go? by Dr. Ramani Durvasula – This compassionate guide helps you navigate one of the most difficult questions in toxic relationships. Dr. Durvasula combines clinical expertise with practical wisdom, offering a framework that honors both your safety and your autonomy in making these crucial life decisions.

Disarming the Narcissist by Wendy T. Behary – When you must continue interacting with someone displaying narcissistic behaviors, this book provides essential communication strategies rooted in Dialectical Behavior Therapy. It offers concrete tools for protecting your emotional well-being while managing necessary interactions with greater confidence and less stress.

The DBT Workbook for Narcissistic Abuse and Gaslighting – Recovery often requires rebuilding fundamental skills that may have been undermined in toxic relationships. This workbook provides structured exercises and techniques to help you reconnect with your inner wisdom, regulate difficult emotions, and develop the resilience needed for lasting healing and growth.

Will I Ever Be Good Enough? by Karyl McBride – For those who recognize patterns from childhood, this groundbreaking book addresses the lasting impact of growing up with a narcissistic parent. Dr. McBride offers both validation for your experiences and practical steps toward breaking generational cycles, helping you reclaim your sense of self-worth and develop healthier relationship patterns.

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk – Understanding how trauma lives in our bodies is crucial for complete healing from narcissistic abuse. This influential work explains the neurobiological impact of psychological trauma and offers insights into why certain recovery approaches work, helping you understand your responses and choose healing modalities that address both mind and body.

Healing from Hidden Abuse by Shannon Thomas – This practical workbook guides you through the specific stages of recovery from psychological abuse with journaling prompts and structured exercises. Written by a licensed therapist, it provides a roadmap for healing that acknowledges the unique challenges of recovering from covert manipulation and emotional abuse.

Remember, healing is not a linear process, and different resources may resonate at different stages of your journey. These tools are meant to support—not replace—professional guidance and your own inner knowing as you work toward greater well-being and authentic connections.

Conclusion

Understanding the signs of narcissism in women is crucial in recognizing and addressing the related harmful behaviors. While dealing with narcissism can be challenging, it’s important to remember that support and resources are available to help navigate these complex relationships. There are many paths toward health that can taken, but the key is to remember that there is support for those who feel stuck in relationships with individuals exhibiting narcissistic behavior.

Further Resources and Support

If you or someone you know is dealing with a situation involving narcissism, consider seeking professional help. Therapists, counselors, and support groups can provide valuable guidance and resources. Remember, you’re not alone, and help is available.

• WebMD: How to Spot Narcissism
• Healthline: How to Deal 10 Tips for Dealing with Someone’s Narcissistic Personality Traits
• PsychCentral: Can Narcissism Be Cured?