February 14, 2024

Can We Have a Future Together?

By Shalayne McMillian
Mental Health & Wellbeing

How do you know this person is the one? Making the decision to devote your time, energy and effort into someone and spending time figuring out, “do I want to be with them?” This can be a big decision, so you want to make sure you’re thinking about it clearly and that you’ve found someone who will lead you to a fulfilling, loving, and healthy relationship. The best way to go about this question is by asking yourself some other very important questions.

How do they treat me?

This tells you a lot about a person, but also gives you insight into how this person may feel about you. Is he/she treating you the way you like to receive care, support and affection? If not, have you communicated what you want/need clearly and effectively?

Do they try to change me?

A big part of being in a relationship is having someone in your life who is there for you and truly accepts you for who you are. They may encourage you to grow as an individual, but they should not be attempting to change the person that you are or the qualities you value in yourself.

Do they fit into my life?

This includes your work schedule, your friends and family, your goals, your interests and how you have fun. Ask yourself how they show up in these parts of your life and whether it’s a way in which you want and/or need them to be, assessing to ensure they are supportive of your goals and values, and you of theirs.

Do they make me feel safe and secure?

Think about emotional, mental, spiritual and physical safety and security. It is crucial for a partner to make you feel comfortable with them. You should feel as if you can turn to them in a time of need and know that they’ll be able to support you in the way you expect them to.

Do they make me feel cared for?

Love and care is a component of relationships that helps identify readiness for a long term future. The ability to affirm your emotions, having meaningful conversations, nurture each other’s inner peace and foster connection builds an intimate relationship.

Most couples want to have a successful and rewarding relationship, yet it is normal for couples to have ups and downs. To meet these challenges, and to keep your relationship healthy and happy, you need to work at it. Having difficult conversations with each other, self-evaluations and seeking professional help can do just that. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us here at Optimum Joy, today!

Written By

Shalayne McMillian

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